


Glitter from eBay

by geniusphilester (gorgeousnerd)



Series: PFF Bingo 2019 [3]
Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Anal Sex, Dubious Consent, Established Relationship, M/M, Oral Sex, Sex Pollen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-03
Updated: 2019-10-03
Packaged: 2020-11-22 06:16:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20869544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gorgeousnerd/pseuds/geniusphilester
Summary: Dan was the only one home when the suspicious package arrived in the post.





	Glitter from eBay

**Author's Note:**

> For the sex pollen bingo space on my bingo card. I picked choose not to warn and added the dubious consent tag because so much of sex pollen can be triggering, but for what it's worth, this is about as consenting as sex pollen can be. (I should add that the consent is extrapolated from previous negotiation over having sex while on cannabis, so warning for drug references related to sex.)
> 
> This is the first time I've posted anything above a teen-and-up rating in this fandom. Enjoy!

Dan was the only one home when the suspicious package arrived in the post. Phil was living his spherical life out of the flat, which, on that particular day, meant he was having lunch with a uni friend he hadn't seen in a couple years. 

When Dan received notice that a package had arrived, he went downstairs to claim it. The box was rotting cardboard, wrapped in packing tape that seemed to barely hold the structure together. It was addressed to Phil Lester, of course, with no return address. 

"Uh," Dan said, wondering for a moment if he could just...not take the package. But the doorperson looked vaguely impatient, and Dan didn't want Phil to have to go to the work of reordering whatever he'd bought. It looked like all Phil's suspicious packages from eBay, so there was really no reason to feel more ominous vibes than usual.

Maybe it's that Dan had no idea it was coming. Phil had probably just forgotten to mention it. He signed the tablet offered by the doorperson and picked up the box gingerly.

Pressure made the cardboard dent under his fingertips. Great.

He got up to the flat before the box split. Dan had felt the cardboard weakening more with each step and had run to the lift and out, and the corner gave way almost as soon as he closed the front door of the flat behind himself. Glitter spilled all over Dan's jeans and the floor. He made a disgusted noise and was just grateful it hadn't spilled its guts in the hallway. All that work, and Phil was going to have to order a different box after all.

Without pausing, Dan threw the destroyed box in a bin bag, vacuumed the spilt glitter up off the floor, and emptied the vacuum's contents into the bag. He looked at his jeans and tried to brush the glitter off, but it was glitter, so of course it wasn't coming off. With a grumble, he shucked the jeans off and also threw them in the bag. It was better than infecting their washing machine with it.

He was sweating when he took the bag to the trash room (in a fresh pair of jeans, of course). This was why getting off the sofa was a bad idea. Phil couldn't get on Dan's case today for sitting on his arse...even if that was most of what he'd done. 

But the sweating got worse as he made his way back upstairs. Ugh. Dan wiped his brow with the back of his hand and willed the lift to go faster so he could get in the shower and pretend none of this had happened.

-

The flat was quiet when Phil got back from lunch. His stomach was pleasantly full of dairy-free pizza; it was wrong to have pizza without real cheese, but he didn't want to be on the toilet all through lunch when he was trying to be social, and the restaurant had done a decent job with the sauce to make up for it.

"Danny boy," Phil half-sung, hanging his jumper by the door. He took off his socks as he walked. It was satisfying to step on the toes of his socks and drag them off. He went by Norman's tank to say hello, and Norman swam forward to see if it was time to be fed.

"Not yet," Phil told him cheerfully with a wave that he wouldn't understand, and he looked at the sofa. Dan's crease was abandoned, and his laptop was closed. Huh. Dan usually didn't do that unless he left the flat, but he hadn't told Phil he was leaving. Not that he had to. He just usually did.

"Dan?" he called, poking his head in the bedroom. No Dan in there either, but the shower in the ensuite bathroom was running. Phil smiled. He could give Dan a good ogle before he went off to putter on his phone.

"Daaaaniel," he said as he entered the bathroom, and then he blinked. He was wearing his glasses, and the room was so full of steam that the lenses fogged up almost immediately. Clearly the shower had been going for a while. "God, are you trying to make a sauna in here?"

Dan didn't answer. Not with words. He groaned in the shower, behind the frosted glass, and Phil's stomach sank quickly. He opened the door quickly to find Dan curled up in the corner against the wall, naked and flushed red. Phil turned the water off, and Dan barely seemed to see him.

"What's wrong?" Phil asked, taking off his glasses. Everything was blurrier, but at least he could make out the outlines of things. "Can you hear me?"

Dan didn't answer. Phil put his hand on Dan's arm to shake him. His skin was hot to the touch.

A groan escaped Dan's mouth again. He looked up at Phil for the first time, but his eyes still seemed foggy and unfocused.

"It hurts," Dan said.

Phil frowned. "What does?"

Dan didn't answer. Instead, he lunged forward and kissed Phil, pressing his entire body to Phil. Including his extremely hard erection, which he pushed into Phil's hip.

"Uh," Phil said after a moment. He was so used to kissing Dan that he had started kissing back automatically, but he pulled away again as soon as his brain regained some function again. "You're not well, Dan. Is this really the time?"

"Feels good." Dan was still grinding against Phil. "Hurts less. Couldn't do this myself."

Well. That made exactly zero sense.

He tried to roll Dan off of him as carefully as he could. But apparently, no matter how out of it or feverish Dan was, he had the strength to hold Phil in a vice grip. The grinding seemed to do little to bring him to climax, but it did give him some clarity in his gaze, fragile though it was. He looked absolutely desperate.

“You want this?” Phil asked. “Even though you’re ill?”

“I want this...” Dan let out a frustrated grunt and fumbled at the flies of Phil's jeans. “I need this _because_ I’m not well.”

That seemed to be all that Dan could manage to get out that wasn’t Phil’s name or pleading.

Phil’s brain blanked out as his anxiety grew. It didn’t help that Dan was warm and heavy on him, fumbling in his boxer briefs for his dick, and the bathroom was so steamy it sucked the air out of the room. Still, Phil was in a better state than Dan, and he forced himself to focus.

As far as he could tell, Dan wanted this. Did Phil? They read each other well at this point in their relationship, had a good decade of boundaries established and redrawn and established again. Morning blowjobs were great. Surprise pouncing in the living room was good sometimes. Dan had a hard limit for silence; he needed to be able to make noise. Phil had a couple hard limits, and a few softer ones.

This was like when they got high, Phil realised. They didn’t do it much, but they had guidelines he could work from.

Phil’s half-hard cock sprang out of his underwear, Dan shoved Phil’s jeans down to his knees, and he climbed on top of him again, moaning with distinct pleasure at the feeling of skin on skin.

They usually pre-negotiated stoned sex. Most days were yes for Dan. Depression days for Dan were a no. Phil was always a wait-and-see; he got paranoid about half the time they got high, and those weren’t good times for him. Dan seemed to be a yes, if not an uninfluenced one. How did Phil feel, right now?

He felt guilty, even as he grabbed at Dan’s shoulders to keep from sliding on the bathroom tile. He didn’t want Dan to regret this. But he’d seemed to be in pain without touching Phil - Dan’s skin had grown slightly cooler, and it wasn’t just because the shower was off, Phil thought - and Phil couldn’t leave Dan to go back to that. Not if it put Dan in danger. Not even if it put him in discomfort. Blue balls were a garbage concept, but this seemed like something else. Something Phil could help.

Phil’s ultimate question to himself was this: could he say no? If he wanted to leave, would Dan let him?

He thought the answer to that was yes. Dan always gave Phil whatever he wanted. He’d said, when Phil had been in hospital last year, that he would rather go through the tests Phil was doing a hundred times than make Phil have to go through everything. A bit dramatic, sure, but Phil believed him.

Really, it probably wouldn’t be difficult for Dan. Phil would just have to ask, Dan would have to slump back for a moment, and Phil would leave. Dan would probably feel too terrible to chase him.

It was the combination of Dan’s pain and Phil’s ability to leave that decided him.

Phil rolled Dan onto his back. He only paused for a moment when he saw how painful Dan’s erection looked; the colour of his cock was more vivid than usual. Would he be tender? But he licked a stripe up Dan’s cock to test it, and Dan tried to chase Phil’s mouth with a thrust of his hips.

Phil had no interest in wasting time. He pinned Dan’s hips to the floor and started sucking Dan off.

They weren’t the type for quickies, not really. But then, sex between them never really felt like distinct occurrences. They were always teasing each other, always poking and pinching and wrestling. Sometimes it lead to more right away; sometimes, it was just a reminder that they would get to more later. They teased each other nearly constantly. Dan teased more than Phil - it was his way of taunting Phil into taking control, sometimes - but Phil liked to edge Dan when he had the patience for it, to bring Dan to the brink and recede before giving him relief.

So Phil didn’t have a lot of experience sucking in all the right ways as fast as he could. But he knew Dan so well, he felt like a piano virtuoso in concert. If the virtuoso was also a porn star. Touch here, lick there, this amount of suction. Dan was nearly shrieking above him, the only word coming out was a strangled “yes” now and then. Phil was deep throating, Dan was thrusting, and it only took a couple minutes and an added finger playing with Dan’s hole to get him coming into Phil’s mouth. The amount of come was surprising; he had to pull off and let it spill out of his mouth a little.

As he caught his breath, Dan was gasping on the floor, too. The gasps turned to groans just as Phil was starting to rally, and it took Phil another moment to realise what was happening.

Dan was still as hard as before, and his erection showed no signs of flagging.

-

The orgasm had bought Phil enough time to get Dan to bed, and Dan was aware enough to feel Phil helping him to his feet and guiding him back into the bedroom.

“Bloody...glitter,” Dan gasped as Phil’s hand grazed his arm.

“What?”

Dan shook his head. There was no way he could explain it now, not with the heat rising under his skin again. Under normal circumstances, this could be a lot of fun. But between Dan’s growing exhaustion, and the pain that came whenever Phil stopped touching him, this wasn’t exactly one of their normal romps.

Phil was stroking his arm, looking around the room quickly. “Do you think you could fuck me?”

“What?”

“More touching is better, right? My mouth seemed to work.”

Dan’s head spun as Phil lowered him onto the bed. He could only nod because he couldn’t think it all through. He just. He needed Phil, in whatever way Phil was willing to give himself.

He was in a haze for a moment before he felt Phil positioning Dan’s left hand, pushing some fingers down and leaving other straight, before he felt him coat his fingers in something cold and fruity smelling. Lube.

“Need to stretch a bit,” Phil said, positioning his hole near Dan’s fingers. “I’ll do most of the work, but I need you to help.”

Help turned out to mostly be Dan making sure his fingers stayed steady enough to go in and out of Phil. Normally, Dan would be crooking his fingers in the way Phil liked, but he could barely keep from writhing on the bed because of the drag of Phil’s walls clenching around his fingers. God, Phil always felt good around Dan, but this was on another level.

After what seemed like a moment and an eternity, Phil carefully pushed at Dan’s wrist until his fingers were free again. He climbed over Dan without much hesitation, lined himself up with Dan's cock, and sank down. Dan's eyes rolled up in the back of his head as he slid all the way inside Phil. The prep they'd managed had eased the way, but there was still a little resistance, a little clenching around Dan's cock. The relief that flooded across Dan's skin felt like diving into aloe vera after a full-body sunburn.

"Don't cry," Phil murmured, wiping under Dan's eyes as he sat on Dan's lap, Dan's cock fully seated within him. "I have you."

"Phil," Dan whispered. He was more clearheaded than before, but it felt like there was a part of Dan that was always this desperate for Phil. It was more like the weird sex glitter had taken away his inhibitions, not given him urges he didn't already have.

And then Phil started riding Dan.

It was deliciously obscene, watching Phil's legs flex, his arse bounce, his eyes closed both for concentration and because, probably, the pleasure was so intense. There was a tension to Phil's shoulders that was loosening the more he did it, like he needed the fucking as much as Dan needed to give it. 

Dan grabbed at Phil's arms, at Phil's arse, as he struggled not to come for a few more moments. Phil was only half-hard still. Dan wanted Phil to get something out of this. He shifted around slightly, and Phil quivered and went still. Phil wasn't loud in bed. It was when he got really quiet that things were really good. Phil moved again carefully a couple times, and he quivered again.

Suddenly, he burst into action. He grabbed Dan's shoulders tight, digging his fingers in, and the brief vestiges of Dan's control were gone. They were rutting against each other like animals, hips slapping and breaths coming out in grunts too guttural to be moans.

Dan bit Phil's shoulder. They were chest-to-chest, and Dan was so intent on the feeling that he hadn't realised that had happened. If he could crawl into Phil's skin, he would, and judging by the way Phil was grabbing him, he felt the same way.

Dan's orgasm came first, surprising him with its appearance, its intensity, and the relief that immediately followed. 

His skin didn't hurt at all anymore. He wouldn't have to go to hospital to try to explain that a rogue eBay delivery was trying to kill him. With sex. It was a relief that Dan felt embarrassed by the thought of explaining all this to doctors. Before, there had been too much pain for shame - or much thought at all - to coexist.

When Dan's climax finished, Phil was climbing off him, come leaking out of his arse. He was still hard.

"Wait," Dan said, grabbing Phil's arm. "You didn't come."

Phil paused and gave him a surprised look. "You're feeling better, right?"

Dan's erection was slowly softening, so apparently, it was obvious. "Yes, but you took care of me. I want to take care of you."

"Dan..." Phil sighed, and his cock twitched. He was still very turned on, and Dan couldn't resist dragging a hand up Phil's leg and listening to his breath go jagged.

Dan, grateful for the millionth time at the size of his hands, curled his palm and fingers around Phil's girth. He paused, grabbed the lube, and used a bit to slick Phil's cock before starting to pump his fist up and down. Phil let out a quiet cry - a major victory for Dan, as noise from Phil never came easily - and thrust his hips erratically to meet Dan's grip. It didn't seem like he could control himself.

"Wanna see you," Dan said in a low voice. Half the time, he sounded like a serial killer when he used that voice. It seemed to have been the other half of the time, luckily, as Phil squeezed his eyes shut and came all over Dan's fist. He sagged on the bed when he was finished, and Dan sagged too, using the last of his energy to grab a tissue and give his hand a cursory pass before he fell asleep.

-

Phil didn't fall asleep, but Dan did. Phil was relieved that Dan was himself again, that they had turned the moment from frantic need into theirs again.

What on earth had even happened?

Well, it didn't matter. Probably. Dan looked a bit messy - probably not as messy as Phil felt - but his skin was no longer flushed and a small smile curled up the corners of his lips.

Phil couldn't resist kissing Dan's shoulder. "Love you," he murmured.

To his surprise, Dan stirred a little. "Love you too," Dan murmured back. "But you're not ordering anything from fucking eBay ever again." 

Moments later, Dan was snoring.

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr post!](https://geniusphilester.tumblr.com/post/188098999406/glitter-from-ebay-2964-words-by-geniusphilester)


End file.
